Sacred Choices

by Christel Nani

The basic idea of this book is that we grow up with a lot of tribal beliefs: instilled by your family, your teachers, your religion and other groups you belong to.  While these beliefs are intended to protect you, they may not be appropriate for our time, and they may keep you from doing what your soul desires, causing a conflcit that can manifest as unhappiness, tension and even physical illness.  Some examples of such beliefs: “Marriage is forever and till death do us part,” “You should never leave a good job,” “You have to work long hours to succeed,” “Life is full of difficulties,” “Easy money is evil.”

The author sets out to help us identify our hidden tribal beliefs and rewrite it.  For unless you change these deeply rooted beliefs, all your positive affirmations and mantras on the mind level would not help. 

An example: a mother, stressed financially and psychologically by her son who stays dependent on her and unwilling to find a job, holds the belief: “A good mother always care for her children.”  Now she rewrites her belief as: “It is reasonable to believe that a good mother cares for her children by setting up boundaries and teaching them to be responsible and independent.”  She no longer feels guilty and shamed if she doesn’t provide for his unceased demands.

The message and the methodology is simple enough.  The bulk of this book is made up of examples, of before-and-after pictures of people with dysfunctioning beliefs about love, family, work, life, religion and money.  The examples are somewhat excessive, but increases the chance that you will find one close enough to your situation.  Each session has some examples of erroneous tribal beliefs and questions to help you undig any you may have. 

One of the exercises is word association.  It was quite an interesting exercise and useful as a basis to find out what area you need to work on.  I tried it out with friends and families, and indeed some will associated “work” with “hard” or “family” with “burden”.  It does get you thinking.

The list of words for association is:
Love, Friendship, Work, Money, Prosperity, Families, Grieving, Being a Good Mother, Being a Good Father, Marriage, Divorce, God and Spirituality, Religion,  Feeling Safe, Suffering, Worrying, Selfishness, Asking for Help, Forgiveness, Mistakes, Life, Happiness, Hopes, Dreams, The nature of Women, The Nature of Men, Sexuality, Childhood, and Childhood Wounding.

The author has a website with her name.  She has workshops and does readings for people.  I would be interested in the three day retreat workshop, though price-wise it seems a bit expensive, though I am sure it would be well worth the cost. 

Published in: on August 30, 2007 at 2:37 pm  Leave a Comment  

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